Note the marvelous ironies of participation:
First, when I load this (2002-01-08), it will be the only page on the web containing any of these words:
But, if one is echoed elsewhere online, and Google notices, the word will cease to qualify as uniwhack :-)
Second, the tuplewhacks above (for example, 'jeweler parkways pathways') qualify at this moment: they have only one Google result. However, as soon as Googlebot sees this page, those tuples will no longer qualify! Google will report two instances: the original, and this report of it. Whaddya gonna call that?
Selfwhack-deprivation? Un-interwhacking? De-uniwhackized?
Scrooge McDuck's First Rule of Self Referential Contrariness: Whack whack whack whack...?
As UnBlinking luck would have it, doublewhack actually is a uniwhack. It appears in exactly one place! A writer named Bruce Ario used it in another writing - but Bruce deserves extra credit for The Dog in Heaven:
Confronting the contradictions in the Bible
Was quite a proposition
For me - a wannabe Christian.
I didn't like to see
Anything left out of something
I'm referring to Revelations.
I was okay with leaving out
Murderers, idolaters, even the sexually immoral,
But somehow I just couldn't agree with leaving out the dogs.
As usual, an UnBlinking tour of the internet - no matter how odd the first step - winds up somewhere wonderful. Enjoy!
2002-01-11 13:00 UTC And so, it begins.
David "JOHOwhacker" Weinberger's Journal qualifies as the first daypopwhack of the term "googlewhack." (Whaddya want from me? I do searchy stuff for a living!) That is, the great engine over at DayPop, finds 'googlewhacking' in Dave's blog, and nowhere else.
The first submission demonstrates an essential lesson in searching: results change. For freaky reasons. Here's the effort from the Googlewhackily-named Cinnamon Brunmeir:
[Please spend a moment juxtaposing 'whack' and 'gazm.org.' Say it aloud. Faster. Again. Wasn't that fun? ]
I heard about your site thru a friend (who runs GAZM.org) & after
3 tries, found a Googlewhack: schadenfreude primp
While schadenfreude is German in origin, it IS in Dictionary.com
& is in common usage in America. :)
I love the idea. Nice job.
< kpe > Los Angeles
However, I am unable to confirm this Googlewhack! Google returns zero results at this time (2002-01-11 13:00 UTC). Your mileage may vary.
Here is your search lesson: with nigh unto 12,000 servers running in tandem, the Google server farm is intended to perform well even when missing a box here or there. Perhaps the schadenfreude box is unwell. We might expect to see this result return in a matter of hours.
Cinnamon: I am privately pleased at your misfortune; perhaps your next attempt will show more meticulous attention to detail :-)
2002-01-11 22:30 UTC Please read instructions before use! Your goal is to find one result!
Cinnamon writes back to point out a slight misinterpretation.
Then, five minutes later, Cinn writes yet again - including a screen shot - of a searchwhack success: "schadenfreude carburetor." Yes, it works, pointing us to the one and only Blastitude Number Five, which contains a great deal of whackful titles such as, "Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung." (The page is dreadfully slow to load in Netscape, but fine elsewise.)
hmmm...I think part of it may have been my misunderstanding of the game.
The original posting quotes:
> So far, I have yet to find a set of two common english words
> which do not appear together on any web pages...
I now see that it must have ONE incidence in order to be
considered a whack. I will continue my quest. I am not so easily denied.
One-paragraph HTML lesson for the week! Hey, Blastitude: drop that crazy white_dot.gif as a background! It's one pixel by one pixel, so Netscape has to render - quick guess - four hundred thousand copies of it every time the browser scrolls. (Sure, it loads quickly in MSIE - but so do most viruses :-) At least create a larger graphic of 4 x 100 pixels, maybe 4 x 1000. Better yet, use the language as intended, setting table color with <table bgcolor= "#ffffff"> - save a billion CPU cycles, worldwide! Stay calm; I'm going easy on you. I didn't mention that the spec doesn't even allow setting backgrounds within a <TR> :-)
Next, I heard from Jeneane Sessum (more namewhacking material) who wrote:
Actually, you won on the first pair! One hit is the goal! (And, I suspect 'sextet' makes for a better band name than micrometer :-)
i started with "unlivable sextet," which gave me only 1 search
result (beginner's luck), but succeeded when I googlewhacked
"unlivable micrometer." A theory: googlewhacking may wind up
producing some pretty cool band names.
thanks for the fun!
2002-01-23 20:30 UTC What hath Google wrought?
Well, such things take on a life of their own; Googlewhacking is living large. It appears that David Weinberger has been on the receiving end of as much mail as UnBlinking. Other folks have jumped in, including Kirsty Darbyshire, Chris Pirillo, Shelley Powers, and Sharon O'Neill. We mustn't forget:
The JOHO reporting even caught the fancy of Ed Yourdon, whose name you really ought to recognize. Seems we're all susceptible.
Attention has been lax (and I don't mean the airport :-) regarding which words may qualify as a googlefactor. For the purist, googlefactors must exist here. This is easy to confirm: Google does the work! Look at the top line of your Google results page. Known words are linked to dictionary.com, and so appear 'underlined.' No line, no link = no score! This settles the proper noun debate, resolves cross-language issues, corrects for misspelling, and speeds up verification. (For the truly devout whacker, it also precludes the use of plurals and some other marginal forms.)
That dictionary lookup link can confirm a googlefactor, but may not reliably deny one. For example, a recent googlewhack header did not provide the dictionary link to 'linux,' although the word is legitimate. A few moments later, the link was present. Why?
We're not sure. Google's servers may balance resource allocation; perhaps they were busy at that instant doing core queries or indexing, rather than word definition lookups. Or, it may be a Googliscious service quality decision: "If the query results are complete before the dictionary lookup, don't delay even a few more milliseconds just to produce that nonessential link."
Another question involves counting multiple sub-pages from one site. Again, Google is the final arbiter, telling us definitively how many unique elements it has divined (then incidentally, whether there are other parallel matches). See the rightmost end of the blue header bar. Consider 'Results 1 through N,' where you want N to be exactly one:
"Results 1 - 5 of 9" : you found five hits.
"Results 1 - 2 of 3" : you found two hits.
"Results 1 - 1 of 3' : you found one hit; Googlewhack!
A few whack-y scoring theories have emerged (in an apparent attempt to drive average folks crazy while Googlewhacking :-) UnBlinking seeks to remind everyone that searching can be fun, and that ordinary folks can find truly interesting stuff - differential calculus not required!
I'm working up some googlerulez for the merely mildly mathematical. Watch this space.
BTW, my personal best to date is microsoft crenelation. Using one of the simpler scoring systems making the rounds (search Google for each word, individually, then multiply the result tallies), it lands at 27,000,000 x 630 = 17,010,000,000. This juxtaposition of commercial and rather obscure words is hardly inspirational, but it is a strict whack.
So, to appeal more to the (Music) Man on the Street (right-of-way) - if you'll excuse pluralization - easements trombones whacks 336,000 x 84,800 = 28,492,800,000. OK, you go.
2002-01-24 01:30 UTC How low can you go?
Neither would stand a chance against the multigig superwhacks noted above. However, they're great whacks, since the components are relatively well known, but mutually exclusive in their appearances. The conjured images are very visual - even tactile.
- Chris Duguid contributes: carmelized contagion (6,600 x 128,000 = 844,400,000)
- Julie Duguid contributes: cartographer hairballs (56,100 x 12,200 = 684,420,000)
As time passes, I see greater sense in seeking a 'lowest' score. Consider any two words with very little presence online. To make an obvious example, I'll use very uncommon words: carminative (with 159 results) and callipygian (with 958 results). Look 'em up; you'll be glad you did.
Carminative and callipygian do appear together ("Results 1 - 8 of about 18") - but all eight hits are 'difficult word' dictionaries. Excluding word lists and dictionaries, as we must, how likely is it for these two words to appear on the same page? If they did, the whack would score a mere (159 x 958 = 152,322). But, wouldn't that page be a real gem?
To assure our sanity, Google recognizes both those words with a live link to dictionary.com definitions. Otherwise, we'd all wind up whacking obscure medical and botanical sources...
2002-01-28 13:00 UTC Googlewhackers around the world now have sent me several hundred proposals - and only a few of these folks even mention a 'score.' This confirms the obvious: finding is fun; scoring is competitive. UnBlinking sez: not everything has to be competitive!
Case in point: Chris and Julie, above. Is 'carmelized contagion' (844,400,000) better than 'cartographer hairballs" (684,420,000)? Is it more creative? Did it take longer to find? Is it more poetic? What the hell is wrong with it just being a Googlewhack? Is Chris better than Julie?
I sent the following out to the first hundred whackers or so:
Thanks to the 99% of you who _are_ whacking in the spirit!
Later, I may post a searing rant against sociopathic
competitiveness and compulsive one-upsmanship, the
concomitant dot-com bust and inevitable collapse of
western civilization... but for now, remember:
If it's not fun, it's not whackworthy! :-)
OK, if you absolutely _MUST_ have 'a score' to keep breathing:
Pure googlewhack = 1
Learn something = 1
Laugh even more = 1
3 = maximum possible score!
See? You may already be a winner!
2002-01-24 19:30 UTC Oh, those crazy Sumerians!
Here are a few recent whacks that pass the Google test - and UB has added a twisty twist to enhance the pleasure.
OK. Are we having fun yet?
||What do you get when you cross a Stymphalian Bird with the Energizer Bunny?
||What is Gale Norton's nickname among spotted owls?
||fringe willowing phenomenon
||What happens when an emergent marsh begins to dry out? (Three words... but quite lyric.)
||What's the only way to defeat both Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan at once? (Google suggests 'octopus,' but acknowledges 'octopi' with a link.)
||What does Dionne Warwick look for on your resume? (OK Meryl, back to work :-)
||What comes on when you suddenly realize your spine is crooked?
||What made Wyatt Earp most nervous? UB pinch hitting: Chris came so close without realizing it - by naming a blog entry 'Jerkwad Vigilantes' - that I refined the whack on his behalf.
||What did the Sumerians see in those pictographs? (JS sez: I have just frittered away my entire lunchtime at work, but finally
found one... Now I must try and get back to work, and not succumb to trying to find
|Tim 'Manic' Ireland
||What does Linus Torvalds consider his greatest achievement?
||Ten thousand years from now, what will be the primary product of Rocky Flats?
||What do you call the fear that 'you may disappear if you leave your house'? (Well, it's a word list... but in Turkish!)
||penumbra possibilities bewilder
||How do people feel when an eclipse begins? (Jeff: look what you started here.)
||What's the name of the universal symbol for 'explosive spark'? (Dictionary.com approves the uncommon spelling. That's why we let Google decide!)
||What do they put on a five-cheese pizza in northern Italy?
2002-01-27 23:30 UTC The Wackiest Whackers Whacks Poetic!
People, people, calm yourselves! I'm not finished with definitions, but here's a work in progress.
|Cory Doctorow||jerkwater plastique||What do you get when you add a pound of sawdust to a gallon of gasoline?|
|Claire Kilner||orchestrator bamboozling||What is the greatest risk to the Boston Philharmonic?|
|Andy Chen||metronome dewpoint||At what temperature does a clock begin to sweat?|
|Gary Turner||plectrum irradiation||What is the best way to sterilize a banjo player's hands?|
|Dane Carlson||Lotsa triplewhacks...|| |
|Meryl Yourish||shinto defenestration||Meryl hints, "What happens when the vow of silence becomes too difficult to bear?"|
|dj||pekoe practicum||Where does one learn the art of making great tea?|
|dj||paparazzo bicuspid||dj closes with a compelling question: "why does this thing get so many comments and stuff like afghan women only get two? is this a quality quantity thing? weird."|
|zagg||zugzwang belshazzar||What was Daniel's warning to the last king of Babylon?|
|zagg||drachma zugzwang||How do Greeks view the need to convert cash to Euros?|
|zagg||zugzwang hydraulics||OK, zagg, there are probably a lot more :-)|
|nedlog||gnocchi optician||Who should you visit if your dumplings just don't look right?|
|Cecily Ordoyne||saluki regicide||What finally happened to the King of Dog Racing?|
|Elise Tomek||banana circumcision||What is the most extreme form of...Doh! Googlethud! It whacks only as a two-word search - "banana circumcision" - with quotes. Fun, but... denied! No whack for you! :-)|
|Moss Collum||hirsute thomism||What philosophy evolved during Aquinas' "Rogaine" period?|
|Scott McMillan||cosmological tollbooth||What's on the cover of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"?|
|Tim Merritt||jesuitical cauliflower||What is the Pope's favorite vegetable?|
|April||ascetic porifera||What is the term for a very stiff sponge?|
|April||misogynist nematoda||Which parasite infects only males of a species?|
|Ben Dyer||pocahontas thumbscrew||What did the Powhatans wish on John Smith?|
|Laura Kiernan||flummoxed tangelo||What do you get when you mix a grapefruit and an orange together really fast?|
|Merlin Mann||fancy parallax bonesetter||What do you call an orthopedist who always lines up the radius and ulna perfectly?|
|Merlin Mann||heraclitean gonorrhea||Which venereal disease is least predictable and most troublesome?|
|Merlin Mann||vegan cowcatcher||What's on the front of the Rutabaga Railway's "Lettuce Locomotive"?|
|Merlin Mann||credenza parthenogenesis||How was the footstool invented?|
|Julie Martin||goaltending taupe||What color do soccer players wear to reduce their visibility to opponents?|
|William Tychonievich||styracosaurus boobs||What is the working title for the next Jurassic Park film?|
|Andrew Raff||sousaphone wasabi||What do oriental tuba players love most to eat?|
|hug-n-kiss||sequacious arthropod||What do you call a spider that just won't stop following you?|
|hug-n-kiss||sequacious fob||What can you always expect to see when your pocketwatch runs too fast?|
|hug-n-kiss||nonagenarian biathlon||What does a gerontologist call the walk from the parking lot to the office, and back?|
|Cobra77||silverfish showstopper||How does legend refer to the "Raid on the Bristletail Ball"?|
|davebug||rigamarole hullaballoo||In private, how do U.S. Senators refer to Congressional deliberations?|
|davebug||formaldehyde explicator||Which speaker do morticians most look forward to at a symposium?|
|- m - ||blithering clops||What is the sound of one exceedingly drunken hand clapping?|
|davebug||maladroit wheezer||What would you call a person who coughs directly in your face?|
|glamwreck||obsequious plumeria||Name a particularly irritating species of tropical foliage.|
|Justin Mason||bearnaise destructor||What is the literal English translation of the Japanese show title, 'Iron Chef'?|
|David Gagne||ovulating kleptomaniac||Who was convicted of the Great Sperm Bank Robbery?|
|Holger||waffenöl zahnschmerzen||Auf Deutsch kennen sie?|
|Alltoocozy||pseudonymous cockatiel||Who was the primary author of the 2002 "State of the Union Address"?|
|Lynda Hicks||necrophiliac cockatiel||...obviously the same bird who wrote that address.|
|Sam||miasmic frenulum||...obviously the technical term for that same bird's hyoid disorder.|
|Chuck Taggart||cockatiel colonoscopy||...what Tom Daschle was picturing during the entire State of the Union Address.|
|Chuck Taggart||macaw colonoscopy||...I think you get the idea!|
|David Farre||bibulous encomiums||...it's as if every whack refers to that entire speech!!|
|Eric||dogshit chalupa||What does Gidget, the Taco Bell Dog, want to serve at the 2002 FIFA World Cup?|
|Carrie Richmond||episcopalian gamelans||Name the warmup band for "The Archbishops' 2001 "Bang the Gong" tour of Indonesia.|
|Matthew Kingston||nucleotide ripieno||What is the favorite phosphoric confection of genetic engineers?|
|Jubilee||carnivore homiletics||How did most privacy experts describe FBI lobbying in support of the Homeland Security Act?|
|Casey Caston||viridian acetaminophen||What kind of placebo was given to test subjects during the Viagra clinical trials?|
|Richard Witmer||interregnum diazepam||What helps maintain calm after the king's death?|
|Rich Miller||comparative unicyclist||Rich actually admits, "Here's the progression I followed:|
cerulean adhesion - 318
pique dimple - 161
wristwatch intestine - 153
bight pique - 134
silverware toothache - 122
crawling handgrip - 91
gauche carbonation - 38
writhe paperclip - 20
polypropylene obfuscation - 8
defibrillation concertina - 7
referential tintinnabulation - 6
comparative unicyclist - 1!
I have triumphed! I rock! I have defeated the synthetic test!"
|Jonathon Delacour||shinto pusillanimity||In Japanese, what words describe the fear of admitting to ancestral religious beliefs?|
|Jennifer Kitchen||googol lactate||What builds up in the muscles of athletes who run the 10100 yard dash?|
|Ian Loftus||buckminsterfullerene sundae||What was the first self-supporting, geometrically stable dessert?|
|Glenn Davis||vulva skullduggery||What was the actual title of the acclaimed porn classic commonly known as "Deep Throat"?|
|Glenn Davis|frumpish honorific
|In interviews about his real-life tryst with Julie Andrews, how did costumier Tony Walton describe the 'Mary Poppins" look he created?|
|Glenn Davis||monoclonal braggadocio||Genetically speaking, what is the common trait among all the people who claim to have 'invented' Googlewhacking?|
|Glenn Davis||flabbergasting pseudopod||What was Leeuwenhoek's utterance the first time he saw an amoeba move under its own power?|
|Glenn Davis|ramify freakishly
|What did Glenn Davis never foresee whacking would do to his life? Glenn reports, "Thank you for wasting many hours of my precious time!! Bastard!! ;-D"|
|Judah McCauley||yeti nuggets spelunking||Name the sport that involves searching for the dessicated offal of rare species in underground caves.|
|Liz Tracey||weltschmerz sterilized ||What describes a person who has responsibly foregone childbearing in order to reduce the impact of human society on other species?|
|Liz Tracey||pumpkin sororicide||When the Prince of Squash coveted the throne, what did the Princess of Cucurbits fear most?|
|Reginald Aubry||triskelion flambe||On Stardate 3211.7, what was Kirk's only alternative to seducing Angelique Pettyjohn's 'Shauna'? (As if he needed motivation!)|
|Lyle B. Højbjerg-Clarke||internet vennation||What technological breakthrough could make ultimate_flame-n-rant-n-spam_revenge.com the most profitable business ever?|
|Mark Colvin||agapanthus eggbeater||What kitchen implement has the same bluish color as a Nile lily?|
|Andrew Jordan||yemenite perambulator||According to El-Al Airlines' security protocol, what single object should be subject to the greatest scrutiny?|
|Byron Bussey||fugacious carburetor||Sez Byron, "What do you get when you chintz on car parts?"|
|David Johnston||skink vacillation||How did USFWS respond when asked to extend ESA protection to Neoseps reynoldsi?|
|David Shaw||chthonic flocculation||Beyond the undying gratitude of humanity, what would you get by sucking the air out of 1,000 lawyers then pumping it into a very deep hole? (Lucky! David got a whack in one!)|
|Earle Martin||hydroxylated marmalade||What euphemistic term did General Electric propose to describe the fruity-smelling toxic sediments it dumped in the Hudson River?|
|Adam Hibbert||love googlewhack||Oops! That whack is suddenly very popular!|
|Julie Frizzell||octopi thalassophobia ||What psychological term describes the fear complex triggered by reading Jules Verne's "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea"?|
|Jilles Ondenbeuving||thaught breadcrumb||Interesting: "thaught" is a valid googlefactor, but the whack actually found a misspelling of "thought."! Hmmm...|
|Holden Richards||eftsoon cider||Holden says, "When one apple is not enough!"|
|Peter Cheng||googolplex polyglot||When deciding upon a name for the Universal Translator, what proposed name did Star Fleet reject as "A bit too Vulcan"?|
|Dave Rutledge||sommelier infarction||What's the phrase you least want to hear whispered at the next table while you're tasting a slightly musty, rather corky Cabernet?|
|Wayne Baisley||fruitcake beseechment||Please, please, please don't make us anything for Christmas!|
|Wayne Baisley||expectorate lederhosen||Wes Craven's script for "Best of the Brothers Grimm" called for "The Giant" to do one thing to which the studio would not agree. What was it?|
|Wayne Baisley||crapulent porker||According to "The Journal of Farm Veterinary Medicine," what is the least common diagnosis made by pig health specialists?|
|Ted Stevko||chiaroscuro hasenpfeffer||What artistic style dominates the dining room at the world-famous "Le Petit Civet" in Paris?|
|Jason Pront|unctuous lepton
|Jason: "A subatomic particle of ill repute."|
|Dave Miller||magnetoelectrodynamic shave||Dave wonders, "What does a plasma razor give you?"|
|Christopher K||serenades supporting helium||Though arguably apropos, what was the most controversial component of memorials for victims of the Hindenberg crash?|
|Heidi Carpenter||apartheid transcriptionist||On the nomination form for a Pulitzer Prize, under the topic "Human Rights Reporting," what category follows 'abuse photographer' and 'violence videographer"?|
|Tom Beattie||mordant kebob||How does the menu at 'The Hurtin' Hot House' describe its signature dish, "Burning Beef on a Scalding Skewer"?|
|Andrea Kremer||funicular swizzle||What proposed Gatorade flavor earned the condemnation of both the Church of Latter Day Saints and the International Olympic Committee?|
2002-01-28 19:30 UTC The Dixon/Greeble Heisenwhack Principle
What to call a self-immolating Googlewhack (one that ceases to be unique after Google spiders a site where the whack is reported)? Kudos to Ray Dixon (of the Greeble domain) for coining the excellent term "Heisenwhack." He based the term loosely on the jargon entry for HeisenBUG.
Paralleling Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, clearly the observer (of a Googlewhack) alters the reality being observed (of a Googlewhack). Heisenberg himself might observe (...get it?), or perhaps Bohr would note, one benefit to web surfers: when measuring Heisenwhack Phenomena, timelines may be expressed in hours or days, rather than femtoseconds or attoseconds.
As a verb, one may 'Heisenwhack' a unique result by displaying it for Google to find (thereby spawning a second result). The noun 'Heisenwhack' refers to the page or citation that causes such dilution.
The Heisenwhack Compensator (for all you Trekkers :-) is easy to use. To find pages that contain your word pair, while excluding other pages that mention this topic, add '-googlewhack' to your query. Google will exclude pages containing that 'subtracted' term from your results.